Murder, friends and sunburn

Hello again,

Two things of varying degrees of inevitability have happened since the last blog: I have joined the PR and Marketing team, and I have been voted the Smile of the Week today. The former was always going to happen, given my love of talking and a platform upon which to do it. The sceond was not strictly inevitable, but bearing in mind that there are only 20 of us here at KISC this Autumn and about 16 weeks of the Autumn Season, there was a fair chance that I would get voted in at some point. Sarcasm aside, however, it is an honour to have my arrangement of face so highly acclaimed, and I have been also allowed to write an entry in the Think Pink! blog which is on the KISC Website here. In addition to that blog, one of the points that came out of the first PR and Marketing team meeting (which sadly was only myself and Pol, the PR and Marketing Assistant here) was that maybe a second blog was required on the website, which would require regular updating to supplement the Smile of the Week blog. So watch this space, my portfolio of written work may well be about to expand...


Other than that, it has been another fun week here in the middle of the Alps. Life is mostly back to normal in the wake of the floods, and we have just about got used to the new tree sat across the island in the river outside the chalet. The Dutch Work Party have arrived, and the Spanish have gone home. Their fiesta fiesta which I mentioned last time was a fantastic event, which had most of us wandering around the centre the next morning looking like moles who have had their warren subject to a round of shelling, jumping at loud noises and complaining at the brightness of the lights. The Dutch were not expected to throw any parties of such magnitude; if anything, I got the impression that we were going to be aided for two weeks by a bunch of geriatrics. However, they seem quite young, and capable of throwing a party so we will have to wait and see. I won't be seeing very much of them this week, however, because Kat is coming over to visit for three days, so hopefully I shall have the opportunity to get up some more mountains and maybe head over to Spiz (pronounced "Shpeatz", lest it's confused with the German word for "horny") to see the second hand outdoors shop. Sadly, in preparation for her visit, my face has gone into full teenager mode, throwing grease out like some sort of spinning deep-fat fryer, though on the plus side this gives me an opportunity to use the facewash I found in the laundry without worrying that it will dry my face out too much (the cold here is destroying my skin! Ahem.)

Another interesting thing that has happened is that I managed kill Miguel. Not literally, of course, but the staff are playing what we un the UK would call redrum, a game where you are given a target, a location and an object, and you have to bring all three components together in order to "kill" the target. If you are killed you have to give your target to your killer, and so they progress until eventually they kill the person who has to kill them, and they have won. I managed to get Miguel in the International Friendship Room with the Salad Bar (which usually lives in the dining room, at the opposite end of the chalet) and even when I asked him to touch the salad bar he didn't quiet understand what was going on. Unfortunately for me, my next target, Jenneke, saw this and as she already knew exactly where and what Miguel had to kill her with, she is now going to be very hard to get. I have considered many plans, some of which involve the Swiss Army, but in the end I will probably have to get someone to help me tie her up and carry her into the Whiskey Bar (a half-finished building in the basement, just off 'the Laundry Cave'). I will keep you posted on how I am doing with the murder game, but for the record this was in fact my second murder: Before Miguel I enlisted the aid of one of the the Spanish Work Party to get Myriam (General director and general boss of KISC) into the Australia room where I hit her with a condom. I had debated long and hard about whether or not to open said condom first, but I thought that touching my boss with an open condom was just a bridge too far. Thankfully she was not fussy about the particulars of the murder.

Anyway, again I have looked at the time and seen that I have a scant thirty minutes before I have to dash and cook dinner for everyone. Vanya is probably not coming back in after this morning as she was looking rather peaky, and for some reason people get very unreasonable when they see the cook sneezing into the soup. So I shall sign off here and go see what everyone else is up to; my two compadres who are due in the kitchen went for a bike ride so I'm hoping that they make it back in time to actually cook some dinner with me!